This is where many people go wrong. Unfortunately, getting things wrong here may very well mean sentencing yourself to a life of unhappiness.
The fairy-tale we all want is to meet Mr/Mrs Right and live happily ever after. Afterall, that was how it happened for Snow White, Rapunzel, Aurora…. you name them.
However, the operative word is FAIRYTALE. Make no mistake about it, marriage is no fairytale.
Imagine living with someone, who was raised from a different background, has different views and opinions, has different perspective on life and living and has a vastly different approach to hygiene from yours.
Perhaps you are of the opinion that marriage is like living with a flat mate. Trust me, it’s a far cry from it.
You don’t need to please, look after, care for and love a flat mate. Most importantly, you don’t get stuck with a flat mate for life. When the going gets rough, you can decide to kick him/her out of your life.
In marriage, you aren’t only sharing your space, you are sharing your life. Just in case you have been thinking you are qualified for marriage because you have lived with a flat mate, please disabuse yourself of that notion.
How then do you go about making one of the most important decisions of your life?
First, is to pray about it and GET GOD’S APPROVAL. This may seem clichéd but there really is no going around it. Going into marriage on your own leaves you ON YOUR OWN.
Seeking God’s approval and acting in line with His direction gives you the assurance that you are not alone. You can rest assured knowing that God who gave this go ahead has it all worked out.
This is not to say you won’t have trying times. You will!!! However, in those trying times, you know you can run back to God and hold Him to His Word.
Ensure to get God’s approval and be sure that it is His Voice you hear, rather than a figment of your imagination telling you what you want to hear.
When God speaks, His accent is unmistakable.
Secondly, DO NOT NEGLECT WARNING SIGNS. Many people who have gone ahead into marriage and neglected the warning signs have either lived to regret it, cut their losses and run or haven’t even lived to tell the story!!
I cannot emphasize this enough. Open your eyes and heed the warning signs.
Don’t assume they are just one offs.
Don’t assume that you can change him or her.
Don’t settle for what you cannot live with.
If you haven’t been in the relationship long enough to see and read the signs, there really isn’t any point rushing into it.
Take your time to study the person.
Thirdly, NEVER LET SOCIETAL, FAMILY OR PEER PRESSURE FORCE YOU INTO MARRIAGE.
This is your life and you will be stuck with the consequences of any wrong actions.
Living to please anyone other than God and yourself will only lead to a discontented and purposeless life.
Close your ears to what society, family or peers say. Live your life. Take your time to make the right decision in line with God’s leading.
No-one will share your pain if you end up in a sad situation. Rather, the same people who forced you into it will tell you that you shouldn’t have rushed things. That is the irony of it.
Liberate yourself from the shackles of other people’s opinion.
Life is a gift. Live it beautifully.
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